The More Things Change ...

We've made it to another year. So far, this year has been an exceptionally busy one. As it is still winter break, Daniel and I have had quite a few visitors to entertain here in the New York.

Tomorrow morning, I'm meeting Daniel's parents for the first time. All week, in addition to work, entertaining Ben, visiting with Irit, packing for the move,and being poor, I have been worrying about this impending brunch. Since Daniel and I are serious about one another, this meeting means a lot.

As I think about this, I have realized that the last few months have been a lot like this. Before the parents, it was parades before his friends and colleagues on multiple occasions. I was almost as nervous then ... and subsequently a little perturbed. It was hard. I suppose that now we're all okay ... but for how much longer?

Wasn't my first date with Daniel enough? It seems like, since that first date, all I've done is continue to "first date." Isn't acquiring a boyfriend supposed to be an end to the array of first impressions that have been my life until now? It seems like the impressing will only become more pressing. In dating, is there ever an end to the first impressions?

Meeting the friends was much more stressful than I ever thought it would be. If they didn't completely ignore me or argue with me (or at least violently shaking their heads), then they were grabbing my ass or sitting in my lap.

I'm particularly frightened about tomorrow's encounter because Daniel's parents are surprisingly conservative. Sure, they're Jews from the East Coast. According to Daniel, however, they're now card-carrying Republicans who live in the South. How in the world will a Jewish Women's studies vegetarian assuage the worries of WASPy parents? Will I ever be good enough? Am I already doomed to disapproval?

I suppose we'll find out in the morning. If I ever see the end to these chronic "first dates," I'll be the first to let everyone know. So far, it seems that the more things change and the less I date, the longer I will continue to be subjected to the same humiliating "first date" conversations. So, here's to a new year of the same shit.